End of a love affair?

Bunch of stockings“This is just the thing I’ve been thinking about lately & was considering posting about it. Why were women once incredibly in love with nylons (that famous date is May 15, 1940 when women mobbed stores when nylon was first introduced), and now detest, are ambivalent about, or only mildly interested in, nylon hosiery (I include pantyhose)?

“A related question: how could stockings – a revolutionary garment brought about by modern chemical technology – have fallen into disregard, nay oblivion – so quickly (at best after 30 years)? These are intriguing questions.

“Perhaps feminism must be held to blame. As Susan Brownmiller says in Femininity (1984, Fawcett/Ballantine Books – perhaps the definitive anti-feminine, feminist tract): ‘the subtle tyranny of the nylon stocking over the minds and actions of women for the next twenty years – until it was partially overthrown by the anti-bourgeois fashion revolution of the Sixties – should not be forgotten.’

“By the late ’80s most women still wore some nylon on their legs. Come the ’90s, and nylon-wearers have become the minority. That’s probably because even women who consider themselves ‘feminine’ have adopted more casual attire.

“The other contradiction I notice about women – and not even particularly ‘feminine’ ones – is the attention to otherwise feminine ‘looks’ – ie grooming and make-up. It’s hard to come across any woman these days who doesn’t paint her nails. Most wear lipstick. Most spend a lot of attention on their hair and skin. It’s in the realm of clothing that attitudes, for some reason, have changed. This is an ongoing discussion… It’s as if there is some kind of sinister plot to put women off wearing nylons. It’s leading to nylon warfare!

“I think what I can deduce from this in a nutshell, is that women always appear to be old enough to decide whether they like nylons or not (possibly influenced) but for a man it is as if nature intended it to be. I certainly didn’t choose to like women in nylons, but I do and I’m proud to admit it, after all it’s something that was out of my control! I never knew the subject of nylon stockings was so complex, it’s like rocket science!”

“Down here where I live in Kent, I have done studies on particular women on a regular basis (excluding my girlfriend) to see how often they wore a skirt and hosiery. The girls that I have studied, at work, in local shops, in pubs etc, have continually worn trousers. This has been over a period of almost eighteen months. Femininity I am afraid to say is rapidly diminishing and female pride in dress sense has almost gone entirely.”

“Yes, we can all agree that there are choices out there – and that we as women should exercise that choice. However, I truly believe that in some cases the trendsetters are putting their ideas out there, and so overpowering any other competition as to make it non-existent. When was the last time anyone walked into a store and found the choices of skirts, blouses and nice dresses to be anywhere as large as the trouser/ jacket sections? I have to hunt until I’m blue in the face to find pretty clothing! All the stuff that is out there makes me think of Communist re-education camps! And as for choices in hosiery – well, here you have to wade through the knee-deep piles (pardon the pun) of opaques and other garbage just to find decent fleshtone nylons!

“And remember who it is that’s running the American Fashion industry right now. All those women who ran around burning their bras thirty years ago! Did you ever see one feminine piece of clothing turned out by Donna Karan? And forget about our pal Calvin – he’s been designing for skinny little boys for thirty years!

“Until we see a new crop of designers come in with the intelligence of Christian Dior or the style of Coco Chanel, we ain’t gonna see anything new.”

“On recent visits to the supermarket, it has been my observation whilst standing in the queue waiting to pay and looking at people’s shopping (and be honest, we all do!) that women are not buying stockings. Even when you look at the hosiery sections, tights are more widely displayed than stockings, and when you go into a newsagent’s shop stockings are not to be seen on display for sale – just tights and pop socks.

“Sadly, although this web site is doing it’s utmost best to promote stockings, I feel that overall the tights revolution has got a ‘foothold’! Even if a woman is not wearing tights, then she is closeted in trousers.”

“In taking a purely pragmatic view of things you’re probably right but you shouldn’t be so defeatist. After all, we on this forum aren’t going to change the world overnight. It is a long haul job and results will be hard to come by but you must keep the faith and believe that stockings will persist and if enough people keep spreading the word then it will get better.

“There isn’t enough publicity about at the moment to make a real difference and of course the manufacturers have an interest in keeping it that way. Just remember, seeing the next woman in stockings will be all the more sweeter just because they’re quite rare.”

Nylon: the last taboo

Stockings... whore?“I just noticed a posting on the Vogue web site fashion forum. A woman didn’t want to do ‘the whole nylon thing’ when dressing-up. Because, get this, ‘some people may think that you’re a prostitute if you wear nylons.’ So that, folks, in the year 2001, is the symbolic state to which stocking-wearing has become.

“Reading the postings here over the past few months I have definitely noticed a transatlantic divide on the stocking issue. In the UK stockings are seldom worn because of the general and lamentable decline in dress standards and trend towards shabby ‘casual’ attire (which applies as much to men as it does to women).

“There does not seem, however, to be much actual disapproval of stockings and suspenders per se. From the postings of our North American correspondents (and especially those from the US) it would appear that there exists quite a measure of outright hostility toward both stockings and the women who wear them. It seems very odd. Can anyone enlighten the board as to just why and when this hostility developed?”

Nylons are, these days, associated by the Western mind with sex and prostitution. This is a stereotyped image, which results largely from about 70 years of glamour photos and erotic films. It is very interesting to note that the use of the dildo by lesbians – which was a common feature of erotic imagery but was in fact far removed from the truth – has in the last decade been adopted by the lesbian ‘community’. How extraordinary that pornographic images, created by straight men for the enjoyment of straight men, have so influenced the sexual behaviour of those women who – superficially – reject men (whilst they simultaneously admire women who masquerade as men!). Basically, human behaviour is influenced/determined by fashion. The baby boomers, bra burners and the rest of ’em think they’re thinking for themselves – in reality, they are just fellow passengers in a never-ending fashion parade. Tell the feminists that nylons are a form of ‘female empowerment’ – and they’ll wear ’em!

“Could some of this be latent emotions placed upon young ladies today by their bra-burning, hairy legged mamas? The baby-boomers’ children are in high school and college now, and are probably poisoned with their wacky ideas. I never understood the boomers’ whole value system – don’t want the children to have a basic moral upbringing, no manners, any sense of right and wrong, etc. because that’s all false; people should just suck it up and take you at your lumpiest – but they’re afraid to admit that they smoked a little weed in college and slept around – for fear that they’ll try it too.

“Here’s my other theorem: part of it comes from pantyhose being made now with more Lycra and spandex in them than ever before, which when worn all day, seems to hold the heat and perspiration close to the body. This is especially true in the summer around the waist area.

“As for being thought of as a prostitute for wearing nylons -who gives a damn? Are we all a nation of lemmings?”

“You are not alone in your wonderment of the people in this country: Grunge clothes are an expression of individuality, but a lady who chooses to wear glamorous lingerie must be a slut. Girdles are frowned on but pantyhose manufacturers are doing everything but dipping women in a vat of Lycra up to their waist to ensure that waist to toe compression.

“Pantyhose did NOT replace stockings because there was anything wrong with stockings – they were billed as being more convenient and more suitable for shorter skirts.

“Even on this forum, some posters want to set moral standards on what age is ‘proper’ for a young lady to wear stockings. There is an impression that it is not possible for a lady to want to wear stockings for any reason OTHER than sex and the gratification of their mates.

“The hostile people one correspondent encountered in the health club last month would not have given her a second thought if she had purple hair and a chain connecting her nose to her nipple! But because she was wearing NORMAL lingerie from the period prior to pantyhose she was harassed.

“Woman need to concede that there are a lot of hypocrites out there that talk out both sides of their mouth and brains. I only wonder what new diseases and maladies will plague woman as, as you pointed out, pantyhose gets more and more confining and restricting. Maybe I need to complete my pre-med studies – might be a run on doctors.”

Stockings: the hosiery equivalent of a fountain pen

Classy stockings“I think the analogy between sheer hosiery and fountain pens is far better than the one with CDs/vinyl. Fountain pens, one would have thought, have long passed their use-by date, but they are still on sale everywhere (even W.H. Smith has a large selection, as does Office World). For most important uses, whether in professional life, social letter-writing or signing Wedding registers, the fountain pen still reigns supreme.

“Maybe we are on a sad path to less ‘everyday’ wearing of sheer hosiery (even I concede that it is seen less now than, say, 10 years ago) but to die out completely – that is both unthinkable and unlikely!

“Sheer hosiery will never completely die out. Nylons are always going to be the ‘get out of jail card’ for these manufacturers. Nothing is ever likely to be as popular as sheer hosiery and they know it. That’s why every so often they will target a new generation with new role models helping the campaign. If they paid Posh ‘tart’ Spice a fortune to wear any kind of sheer hosiery tomorrow (and for her it would have to be a fortune!) you can bet your bottom dollar all of a sudden they will be the most popular item since sliced bread!”

“It is funny that you should mention fountain pens, as that exact same thought crossed my mind. I have no idea what the demographics of the fountain pen buyer base are, but I would suspect that they are on the older side. (I myself only use fountain pens, but at 34, I am considered an eccentric in my office).

“If we look for another analogy, consider the classic American station-wagon. From the ’50s to the mid 1980s, the driveways of suburban America were filled with large, traditionally styled, separate-chassis station wagons, replete with whitewall tyres and woodgrain panelling. They were the symbol par supreme of middle-class American family life. Over a few years, the market for these cars collapsed. It was not because of fuel prices or anything like that, it was just that (younger) buyers decided, en masse, that they did not want them anymore.

“This is not the place for a detailed analysis of why, but suffice it to say that General Motors cancelled its last surviving traditional station wagons in 1996 because it could more profitably employ its resources elsewhere. The new generation of buyers had, for whatever reason, decided that the big wagons were no longer desirable, and simple economic logic dictated that production was no longer viable. This same logic is, I firmly believe, applicable to hosiery. Marketing people make mistakes, but they have their finger on the pulse of consumer tastes, and marketers are particularly keen to gauge the tastes of the young, for they make the buying decisions of tomorrow. It really is as simple as that, alas.

“I don’t know where you are based, but here in West Yorkshire, the use of fountain pens is pretty rare. They tend to be confined to doctors, headmasters, solicitors, accountants; that sort of occupation: professionals of a traditionalist leaning, although I concede that there are yet more that use them (myself included). Compared with FF stockings, however, they are as common as the day is long. My last FF stocking sighting occurred in the town of Keighley in the late summer of 1991. Two formally dressed ladies in their late 50s were strolling around town, presumably on their lunch hour. As they passed, it became apparent that one of them was wearing FF nylons. I nearly died of shock, having seen no FFs for many years previously. She noticed my interest and smiled knowingly. Since then, no FF sightings whatsoever, though I have seen other types. FF stockings are – to all intents and purposes – extinct, and have been for a long, long time.”

“After Aristoc ceased their manufacture (on commercial grounds alone) in the mid-1990s, there were a few doldrum years, but fully-fashioned stockings are once again freely available – from at least three different manufacturers, in a variety of styles, colours etc. In fact they’re probably on sale at more outlets (including online) now than at any time since the 1960s. I don’t think that, in the long-term, women are so boringly self-unaware that they will TOTALLY shun sheer legwear.”

Stockings: facing extinction, or not?

Stockings at work“One correspondent recently suggested that the relentless slide toward lowest-common-denominator dress has some merit, i.e. that it made the increasing rarity of stockings all the more desirable. I have to tell you now that I find this argument pure, unalloyed nonsense.

“Firstly, I am sure that I speak for all those readers who enjoyed the second, all too brief, flowering of stockings in the latter 1980s and very much regretted the sudden and, I think, final, collapse of stocking wearing circa 1991-1992. Life is simply much poorer and more dreary without femininity in ladies’ dress. Of more relevance, however, is some actual ‘field’ research I have carried out in the past two weeks. Desperate to establish why the trend has been toward ever more casual (indeed, ultra-casual) dress, I began to quiz young women of the ages 18-25(ish) on their tastes and preferences. Without exception, all expressed their distaste for tights. A few grudgingly complied, wearing 70 denier opaque tights, but only when they absolutely had to, i.e. in those workplaces where such a dress code existed. I then openly asked the question: what of stockings and suspenders? Again, without exception, every single one expressed their complete scorn for the very idea. One suggested that she might wear white stockings on her wedding day, and another thought that perhaps she might wear them ‘in the bedroom’ (her words) to give her fiance a special treat.

“The last of these ‘interviews’ took place in a pub on Wednesday evening; every female present wore either trousers, jeans, leggings or tracksuit bottoms. My research was carried out in the north of England, but I suspect its results hold true for the rest of the country. Given that these women are the future, it seems highly likely that hosiery in general is in terminal decline and stockings, obviously, will be the first to go. The attitudes of the women I questioned were unequivocal: we don’t want to know. Peer-group pressure, an immensely strong force, will guarantee conformity. So, those here who enjoy the ‘exclusivity’ of those ‘rare and exciting’ glimpses, savour your next sighting, it may be your last.”

“For several years now I have been keeping a count of how many times I have seen a woman wearing stockings. Just for the record these are the results

1990 32
1991 – 56
1992 – 138
1993 – 144
1994 – 74
1995 – 81
1996 – 59
1997 – 81
1998 – 138
1999 – 104
2000 – 140

“I’m not sure that this really proves anything, except that here are still plenty of women wearing stockings if you know where to look.”

“I don’t know if there are geographic, economic and social class factors at work here, but as a Londoner, I can confirm that professional women (including businesswomen, lawyers, secretaries etc) in London wear dresses/skirts almost all of the time, and whilst I agree that it is not universal, I see no sign of extinction of hosiery (opaques in winter, sheer in summer) for a long time yet!

“Even on a recent week-end trip to Nottingham, I was pleasantly surprised by the number of women, of all ages, wearing dresses/skirts, and hosiery of one sort or another – and these were clearly not being worn as part of an office dress-code etc. I was also pleased with the quality of the legs seen!

“I also live near a prep school, and a number of the mothers I see every day collecting their children are wearing dresses and hosiery. These are, by and large ‘stay at home’ mothers and housewives.

“So, I’m happy to spread a note of optimism amongst all the gloom and doom!”

“You are both right and wrong in my opinion. Strangely enough I have also had the odd conversation with some women in the appropriate setting when answers are more likely to be given more freely and truthfully. Down here in London I fairly frequently catch a glimpse/definite telltale sign that a fair number of women under 30 (even 25) are wearing stockings these days. But I don’t think the ridiculous cost of living down here is worth putting up with just for that, however nice it may be!”

“Having read today’s ‘Times’ Part 2 supplement, there’s an article confirming the ‘bare legged in all weathers’ look as a Northern thing, and a ghastly photograph of a couple of slappers sitting outside a Newcastle nightclub wearing criminally short skirts, and warming their ugly bared toes! To add insult to injury, the article goes on to say something about the only non bare-legs seen in the wintry North being women wearing opaques, who are regarded as wimps by all the others!”

“I think you need to broaden your horizons. In the shop I see women in stockings every day – aged from 18 right up to their 60s. Around town fishnets are everywhere you look. Okay, so they are probably tights but it shows that girls are thinking about what they’re wearing on their legs and that’s a good sign.

“I have to admit that when I go to the launderette I don’t wear stockings but if I’m going anywhere remotely interesting then I dress up a little.”

“Fact: fashion is cyclical.

“Fact: in my experience young women around my age seem to be increasingly turning to holdups which, while still maybe not enough for the purists, is a Very Good Thing.”

“I’ve read articles about nylon stockings and without doubt the fact they have been a phenomenon (easy for me to say!) over 60 years is proof of the pudding. But it’s fair to say sales will never reach the heights they once did. It could be a fashion cycle issue or it might be a society issue but one thing’s for certain, if any product is not advertised to the widest audiences it won’t sell too well. During the eighties nylons were advertised on British TV, newspapers, bus shelters and those giant bill boards (crikey the number of times I nearly hit a lamppost when driving past the boards!).

A question of ethnicity?

Kei NishikoriWould anyone care to shed some insight on whether certain ethnicities are more inclined to wear stockings as opposed to others? I would like to hear some feedback.

– It is an issue I have been thinking of recently as I stock ‘skintone’ stockings which could seem a bit offensive to some customers. Even though 95% of my stocking customers are white I have been thinking of stocking a bitter chocolate colour as well (although this is for selfish reasons as I think they’d look great on dark skin) – I’ve got a few black and asian friends so I’ll have to find out what they do for hosiery.

– Here in OZ, the plane loads of young female Japanese tourists who come here seem to have a fixation with hosiery. I have even seen them wear ph with their bathers whilst swimming at the beaches here! In Singapore, the office and shop girls dress extremely well, with great attention paid to their hair and make-up, always with skirts/dresses and pantyhose and heels.

But the most delightful sight is in Bangkok where the office girls in lovely tight skirts, pantyhose and heels seem to be able to gracefully board and disembark the ferries on the rivers without the help of gang-planks. This involves stepping (really more of a leap) up onto the jetties, from ferries which don’t actually stop but merely slow down a bit. You can spend hours watching this and not get tired of the parade.

I’m sorry to have mentioned the dreaded ph word in this forum, but when you are a dedicated leg man and stocking watcher such as I, one has to carefully take notice of what is being worn and take the bad with the good.

– When I lived in San Fransisco and Oakland in the late ’70s and the early ’80s, it seemed that seams were the required getup for Central American, particularly Nicuraguan babes out on a date, or dressed up out with husband and the kiddies on a weekend night. I used to see Mexican and Mexican American babes all seamed up in LA and at big Tejano dances I used to go to in South Tejas during the same years. Even here in Miami I have been at the home of middle aged Latino friends and seen the wife getting all seamed up for a night at some cultural association.

Not to mention my soul sisters. I have seen some really seamy black women. In the south especially it continued I think into the 1970s as a dress up for church thing.

– Is there necessarily a rule that hosiery should match leg colour? White women wear black or dark-coloured stockings after all… I think a black woman could well look stunning in cream or white hose!

– Living in a large urban area with a huge black population I have come to the conclusion that the sexiest, most ladylike women are African-Americans. Even yesterday at the mall the most glamorous woman was a black woman in gorgeous calf-length summer dress and high-heeled sandals. Her white sisters generally looked ugly in ill-fitting tank tops, shorts and flats. There is hosiery designed for African-American women. And it’s ‘skin-toned.’ But like the ‘racist’ connotations associated with ‘skin toned’ band-aids, ‘skin-toned’ nylons are not the right shades for black women; these stockings are for dark pigmentation & some very sheer. Generally speaking the only glamour left in America is among black women. If you want to see wonderfully-dressed women, in the sexiest shows and, yes, wearing nylons, go to black concerts or nightclubs or gospel services on Sunday.

Your observations equate very well to fashion trends in Atlanta. Offices, clubs, shows, churches, and streets reflect more feminine attire among African-American women in Atlanta.

Loving the woman in the stockings

modella_in_autoreggenti_20130627_1392019014I have been with my girlfriend for eight months and have been a stocking/hosiery lover on women for a number of years (ever since I convinced my high school girlfriend to wear hold-ups about eight years ago). When I first brought up the subject of hosiery with my g/f, she told me she hated to wear pantyhose/nylons… which I took to mean all hosiery. I then asked her what she wears on her legs for special occasions when she has to dress up, and to my surprise she told me stockings, specifically hold-ups. She has worn hold-ups when we have gotten together for a few special occasions, but she has not chosen this form of dress on a regular basis since I have known her.

This past weekend, she and I attended a wedding shower for a friend of hers. The week prior I asked her what she was going to wear, and she said that the bridesmaids (which she is one of) were asked to wear a long dress/skirt. I was fearful of asking her about hosiery (in order to not sound like a pain in the ass about it) but to my surprise, she said that she would like to wear a garter belt and stockings under her dress. You could imagine my excitement at hearing her initiate that, because up to this point in our relationship, I have initiated her wearing of stockings by verbal request or by buying them for her.

So the night before the shower, she and I went out shopping, and together we picked out a beautiful and sexy black, silky garter belt form Frederick’s of Hollywood. She said that she was going to be wearing a long brown dress, so she felt tan/nude stockings would compliment it best. That was the colour we chose, and after a nice dinner together, we went back to my house, where she gladly modelled her new treasure for me. She asked me as well to help her don her new hosiery, and show her how the clasps work, as she had never done this before. I told her I did some research on the subject (many thanks to all of you women on this site who have educated us men and other women on proper donning and clasping). During the time we spent afterwards (her modelling her wonderful legs, me admiring and drooling over them!), what I thought to be an insignificant incident happened. While caressing her legs, the velcro on my watch band nicked her right leg. We saw no immediate damage to the nylon and so our night continued on. The next day, as I was driving down to see her, she called me on her cell phone to tell me that she was not going to wear the garter belt. Momentarily dumbfounded , she then explained to me that she found a hole in one of the stockings when she tried them on… right where my watch band had nicked it! I of course, was immediately disappointed, and she too, expressed her dismay that she could now not wear her new lingerie (she had no other stockings, nor the time to go buy new ones). She said she would try on some hold-ups and see if those would work. She told me I would find out what she decided she was going to do when I saw her, which turned out to be the following… Bare legged.

By the time I saw this, my disappointment had passed, and I was just happy to see her, because she looked very beautiful in her brown dress and high heeled black sandals. I could only imagine how the stockings would have looked on her gorgeous legs in that dress and sandals. Regardless, we still had a wonderful weekend together.

I also made two observations that weekend as well. All the young women (20s and 30s) were barelegged at this shower, and the night before when my g/f and I were out to dinner, a group of high schoolers from a prom came into the restaurant, and out of the 15-20 girls who I observed, almost all of them were bare legged. That really blew my mind, and I know that observation has come up much on this forum. When I attended my proms in the early and mid ’90s, the young ladies would not be caught dead bare legged at that type of function. I even overheard female classmates of mine stating that they were going to wear hold-ups. These sightings (or non-sightings!) were most disappointing to me for I long for the return of hosiery into everyday wear amongst the younger female crowd. My own opinion is that this will not be the case forever, and that like any trends, bare legs will go out of fashion, and hosiery will resurface. I remember being a kid in the ’80s and seeing images and media from the ’70s of people in bellbottoms and thinking how ridiculous that looked. I told myself that bellbottoms would never come back, but they resurfaced in the ’90s and are still considered appropriate today. I feel the same rebound will happen for hosiery and stockings.

In terms of my girlfriend, the fact that she likes hold-ups/stockings is only one of the many desirable qualities I love about her. It is her in the stockings that I love, not the garments themselves (that point as well has been mentioned before by this site’s contributors). I do not expect her to convert to a full time stocking wearer, (or even half time) and it would have no impact on how I feel about her if she were to not increase the frequency of her stocking displays. What I love most about it is that she knows I like her to wear stockings, and she makes the effort to do so (and has fun with it!).

Wearing stockings on an everyday basis

reggicalze_in_macchinaI had a big discussion with some lady friends of mine that wear stockings only on specific occasions (such as a sexy night out). They told me that they wear them to arouse their boy friends or husbands with the purpose of having sex. I totally disagree; I find it much more interesting and arousing, that a woman wears stockings on an everyday basis. The fact that a woman wears stockings and suspenders just because she thinks that she might have sex that evening is a turn off.

– I wear stockings or hold-ups every time I wear a skirt or dress. I have been wearing stockings since I was about 16 or so as tights did not agree with me. These days I tend to wear more hold-ups than “real” stockings, but I still wear “real” stockings maybe 3/4 times a month.

– I wear stockings on a everyday basis. On special occasions I wear black fully fashioned by Gerbe and I have not even thought about wearing tights. By the way, I am 39 years young, and my husband loves it even more than I do. Seeing me in stockings that is.

– I don’t wear stockings every day but I do wear either stockings or hold ups every time that I go out, even if it is just shopping. I would feel naked if I wasn’t wearing any hosiery and I don’t like tights. So you could say that, relatively speaking at least, I always wear stockings.

Stockings are just a normal bit of clothing that I wear, they just replaced tights.

Finding a stocking-wearing lover

stockingswearingI posted back on the 23rd of May, 2001, humbly requesting a “stocking partner”. A woman who shares my extraordinary penchant for a woman’s gartered nylon stocking-clad legs. I was certain that I would receive a reply. To date, I have received none. I then posted on the 29th of May inquiring as to whether this forum was for discussion only or, might one utilise such a “stocking resource” in search of a female stocking partner. Again, no response.

I answered a plea for a man who could appreciate a woman’s gartered nylon stocking-clad legs as her boyfriend (of one year), failed to appreciate them despite the fact that she immensely enjoys wearing stockings. But again I received no reply.

I am again extending my humble invitation to a woman (or women), so inclined to please contact me so that we might mutually ecstatically enjoy your gartered nylon stocking-clad legs.

– Ladies should be wanted for more than just the stockings they wear, they are people also.

– I must agree. I think you are trying to put the cart before the horse to coin a cliche. First find a woman you thoroughly enjoy who thoroughly enjoys you. This should ideally be done through friends or mutual acquaintances. Try your church or some other social environment. Stay away from bars, the Internet and dating services. Find someone geographically close to you. Time and distance can kill a relationship. And stop leading with your bottom line (stockings). You are setting yourself up as a mark for a con person.

After you’ve met the next significant other then, gradually introduce your fetish. Start with small gifts. At first it should be a book (not about stockings) or some other small (non-sexual) memento. Then, after a few months, if things are getting more intimate, you may wish to buy really nice stockings and a garterbelt set from a first class purveyor. But, don’t do this before you have had intimate relations with her. Otherwise, she may consider you to be forward or assuming more than you should. Do more listening than talking and you will know when the time is right.

She may have a few fetishes of her own. And, you may find some of hers as unappealing as she may find some of yours. If she had read you her laundry list of kink before you had even begun dating her you may have been frightened off. But, once you have established a foundation of trust and love these other things can be added, or not. By then it may not matter to either of you.

But if it does matter to you, if you cannot be happy unless your significant other wears stockings either daily, or while making love, or both, you, sir, may have a decision to make. Take her as she is or start all over again with someone else and, in either case, hope for the best. If you decide to leave, be a man and tell her why. Make sure she understands its not her “fault”. Its just the way it is for you.

And, one other thing, leave your first wife and any conversation, pictures and references totally out of your next relationship. Only speak of her when asked. No one wants to think they are being compared to, or are simply a replacement for, another person.

– I knew this forum had some redeeming qualities… somewhere… somehow… Thank you so very much. Your points are well taken. As I have previously mentioned in this forum… one’s fetish can become obsessive. Especially when one has been graced with its being addressed so well for so many years. I had 12 years of ecstasy my late wife. I had five years of stocking-clad love-making with my girlfriend prior to that. In both instances, I determined, at the inception of the relationships, whether they preferred stockings or pantyhose. It would appear that my prior methods should be altered. I will endeavour to do so. Thank you all again very, very much. I trust you all understand. My intention is/has not been to offend. To anyone I have done so… I apologise.

But if one were ever to decide to exercise such forthrightness with one’s predilection to such a fetish preference, is there a more appropriate venue than a stockings forum? Are we not all frequenting this forum in an effort to locate and discuss our stockings fetish with persons who share our proclivity. Many people have expressed various ideas of how to proceed in attempting to find women who enjoy and prefer wearing stockings via this forum. I am included in that number. My regard for your advice is no less heeded but I trust you may appreciate the dilemma I, and others like me, share.

– Your situation is not unique in one respect. A good number of the men who post here would like nothing better than to find the kind of wonderful woman you shared your life and love with for 12 years. I have seen her picture at a site you had directed us to earlier. She was quite beautiful and you have my deepest sympathy for your loss.

Because some men can only dream of such a partner they cannot feel the loss of her half as keenly as you do. I can hear this sense of loss and loneliness in your posts. So can women who, as a gender, tend to be much more sensitive to such things than we fellows. For so long as some women can still hear your longing for your late wife they will not feel comfortable being with you.

Try thinking of it the other way round. If you had passed first you may have hoped that your widow could once again find happiness. You would not want her to grieve too long. You would want her to find happiness with another man secure in the knowledge that you could never be replaced in her heart.

I seem to remember a post from a woman a few months back where she said she would prefer not to date men with a stockings fetish. It was very revealing. I think many of the women who post here feel as she does.

Having a proclivity for something may not mean you want it to be the foundation of your relationships. I think this is especially true of the ladies here. They may love stockings every bit as much as we do but sex for women is different than sex for men. It’s in the wiring I think. For men sex is a physical feast. Stockings are the flame in the flambe, the cherry on top of the sundae, the spice in the entree. For women it seems that sex is a gift they choose to bestow on those whom they invite to have it. It is the aperitif not the appetiser. We are generally too anxious. They are generally more reserved. For many men sex is the sooner the better. For many women sex seems to be when all else is right first. But, women know men equate stockings with sex. To try to begin a relationship with a woman by being a “stockings partner” is, for many of them, too start to know them on too intimate a basis too soon. It took me almost eight months to use the “s” word (stockings) with my bride of 30 years. I met her through a mutual friend.

I sincerely hope you find that little doll to play with again. She is out there. But, I’d be quite surprised if you found her on the Internet. She may be just down the street.

– I think the sad truth of the matter is that there are not enough stocking clad lovelies to go around.

However, all is not lost as there frequent stories here posted by men who have successfully persuaded their girlfriends and wives to swap over to stockings. (I’m sure if you did a post about this subject there would be lots of encouraging, and interesting, replies).

I think your best course of action would be to find a lady you’re attracted to, then work on the finer details!

– First, allow me to thank you for sharing your thoughtful, sincere and, I might add, colourful, sentiments concerning my plight. I suspect we would find engaging in a conversation on this and perhaps, many other topics most interesting. I find your ideas and thoughts quite sagacious and provocative to say the least.

You are correct in your assessment of my relationship with me late wife. I am quite honest however, when I divulge the point in our relationship when the subject of her wearing stockings actually occurred. Unlike you and your bride, I was not left to wait eight months before the subject was addressed. It was eight minutes into our initial conversation. And while her wearing stockings was not the basis of our relationship, I believe you can appreciate the importance of that aspect of our relationship being a stockings admirer yourself. It is very important to us is it not?

Fortunately, she understood and as she was already predisposed to wearing them, it was not an issue. We immensely enjoyed that aspect of our relationship as well as many, many other aspects. Thus, we shared a very special and unconditionally loving 12 years together.

You might agree, by the way, that we fetishistic individuals are at a disadvantage compared to our more conventionally inclined male counterparts. Most men, tactile and visual as we are, prefer that part of a woman’s anatomy that is readily visible and accessible… the breasts. A man with such a preference has little difficulty determining whether he is interested in a woman based upon that part of her anatomy. He identifies the size and shape and determines whether he is interested. For “leg men”, it is not quite as facile. These days, women are more inclined to wear trousers, jeans, sweats, etc. The legs are unrevealed. We must wait, or guess, as to whether the woman has full, shapely legs or not. The issue of accentuating their beauty with stockings poses even greater future difficulties. Indeed, ours (leg men), is not an easy preference to satisfy.

I am inclined to agree with the current assessment that there “are not enough stocking clad lovelies to go around”. Yes, I had what many people aspire to have. A relationship with my true “soul-mate” for the years with which I was blessed. It is those many years that renders my situation at this time, so very difficult to negotiate. As I mentioned, to have experienced my fortune for so long and to currently be without is very difficult. The love aspect is one thing… the fetish aspect is quite another.

I do not expect to ever find another woman to love, be in-love with, to cherish, to truly and unconditionally be my friend and with whom I would be a friend. I am endeavouring to satisfy my stocking-clad leg fetish via this forum as well as other avenues.

Tips for stocking spotting during jury service

RHT stockingsI have jury service for two weeks commencing this coming Monday. Anyone got any suggestions of where/what to look out for in the way of girls/women wearing stockings/holdups. I am in London. I look forward to your interesting ideas.

– In most courts, the jury bench is square-on to counsel’s row so, depending on which position you are along the bench, you may get a direct view along counsel’s row. If you have a short-skirted lady barrister sitting nearest to you in counsel’s row, you might be in for some good views, although there may be someone sitting between you and her, interrupting the view.

Although the barrister’s gown may add a protective layer, when sitting down, it most often falls away, allowing unimpeded view of the legs beneath.

Unfortunately, you will not have access to the bar mess, or robing room – which is usually my best viewing area. Most robing rooms are now unisex, which allows unparalleled opportunities for seeing such things as changing shoes (great for the reinforced heel/toe enthusiast), adjusting skirts etc, and lounging around in fairly low armchairs, which makes it impossible not to see any stocking-tops that may be on offer. I have yet to see someone actually adjusting her stockings, although I have seen more than one discarded pair in a wastepaper basket (presumably the actual changing took place in a toilet cubicle).

Anyway – good luck! Unlike you, however, not only am I in court every day – but I actually get paid for being there!

Some women wearing stockings, when standing up, will run their hands over the front of their skirts to make sure they’re still “done up”. Or you could try looking for the little bumps at the front if the skirts are tight. Good luck.

Wearing stockings in summer

stockingsinsummerAmong certain fashion arbiters of taste it is said to be a no-no to wear stockings in summer. Of course, with the gauche trend towards stockingless legs generally, it’s not surprising these so-called fashion mavens would rail against nylons during summer with a vengeance. At one time, women tended to wear stockings throughout the year, even in summer, though there was more tendency to go stockingless in hot weather even in otherwise dressy occasions. What do you folks think? There is also something known as “summer nylons” which appear to be an even lighter weight nylon knit. Can anyone shed information on these?

– It’s much too hot in Arizona for wearing stockings. With temperatures in excess often of 106 degrees it becomes almost dangerous as heat stroke is a real danger here. Even with air conditioning, the extra heat generated by stockings can cause a person to collapse when the temperatures reach beyond 106 degrees. I do manage on some of the cooler days to wear stockings, but I must be careful, on the hotter days. Sometimes if the night cools off a little I can wear stockings for a short time, but still I must be cautious. But in the cooler seasons stockings are a welcome addition to my wardrobe.

– I remember my mother (in the late ’70s early ’80s) would swap over from tights in the winter to stockings in the summer as they were cooler. I used to love watching her get ready to go out of an evening and turning from ‘mum’ into some glamorous creature. I guess dad used to look forward to the summer months!

I still wear stockings in the summer, at the weekends or if I’m going out in the evening – just not everyday.

– I wear stockings almost every day, and to church. However, I don’t see the point in wearing stockings if I’m pottering in the garden, or with a ratty pair of shorts and a t-shirt to hit the yard sales on Saturday mornings. Usually, my rule of thumb is – if it’s an event that needs a girdle, then stockings, too.

– I would think stockings in the evenings would be wonderful for woman to wear. During the day a nice cotton dress and thong/french knickers and bra must be the best way to feel good and look good?

– Yes, there are “summer stockings”. I wear Charnos seven denier stockings. Atlanta’s heat demands the relief the seven deniers provide me in the summer, while allowing me to present the professional image I deem important. I also wear them for dressy evenings out because of their sheerness.

Today, they are offered only in lace tops. But, Charnos sold them with nylon welts until recent weeks.

– The humidity in the Chicago area can drive the temperature index well over one hundred degrees so you have to watch how you dress. A skirt and stockings would be okay for a dinner or show in an air conditioned place. My wife gets to wear her share of stockings in the summer and her pleased public gets an eye full of a great pair of legs. You would not catch her bare legged or bare footed in a dress up situation. She goes bare legged wearing shorts or something of that nature. She knows when and where to apply her dress code. And I am a happy and grateful husband!

I am often in Milan (Italy) for business and as you all know, it is the world’s centre as far as fashion is concerned. As you might have read, the new fashion is now to wear stockings as often as possible (“bare legs are out for now ” say the designers such as Valentino ). I am pleasantly surprised that when I go to that city women wear skirts more often then trousers and stockings at least to the end of July ( before the summer holidays). This is because it is considered unsuitable to show too pale legs and most definitely unbecoming. so if you want to spot stocking tops in summer , you must go to Milan.

By the way, has anybody noticed that Japanese women always wear tights even in the hot season? This is because it is considered to be unhealthy to go bared legged.

I think that every season is becoming “non-season” for nylons. In the summer they can’t wear them because it’s too hot. In the winter can’t wear because they’re too sheer so have to wear tights or ribbed leggings for warmth. That leaves spring and fall. But even those windows are getting narrower as bare skin moves into colder weather (hmm, why don’t they think that’s cold?) And tights take over too soon. Stockings are simply getting crowded out!